Lookin forward to a Getaway Darlin's!

[Mood: Excited]
[Music:Enrique Iglesias - Hero]

My week so far has been rather eventful.Went out here and there and that did make it rather intersting I guess.On Wednesday,I did a little shoppin with mum.She was complaing that am such a tiresome shopper cause I kept makin her walk from one end of the mall to the other and also I can be rather picky and all.(:P)...Yes I admit that ppl cause I have this bout fallin in love with something before gettin it so yeah...am agreeing to that..lolz...So I got some stuff I've been craving for the last few months.Which was a pair of oversized shades and a denim skirt.So totally physced bout tht!!Had lunch after that with Dad.It was rather quiet lunch actually,without my bro and sis.But I realized then,that if I were the only child...my parents would pay wayy to much attention on me and that's not too good..lolz...yes I know that's rather bizzarre but they'll check on your scheulede and check on you too much..so yeah..lolz....not good!.....came home in the evening and it was raining so badly...*sheesh*....also I got a pair of 3quart jeans and a new wallet from Maggie T.They have rather cute stuff actually...

Headed to skool on Friday.I missed skool sooo much!Espeacially my gurlz!The gf and I exchanged stories and laughed a lot..as usual..lolz...Esther came to skool as well...everything else was pretty usual...won't be goin to skool next week though....*shiffles*

On the bright side..am goin on vaca!!!!....I need one soooo soo badly...and its by the beach so thats totally awesome!!...pool side,sand,sunsets and beach...seems pretty perfect..lolz...and am probably gonna do loadz of writing and sleeping and probably some lying around doin notta.... well if I have time(:P)....So the next post will be probably bout the vaca and my writingz......To all my dearies who see me online like 24 7...I won't be around next week ya...I'll check in with you guyz when I get back...Gonna miss my lappie and my online ppl...but I'll be okies..lolz......Well that's it for now darlin's!...take care and God Bless!

L.O.V.E

It's better to forget & be happy than to remember & be sad

[Mood: Alive]

[Music: Jason Mraz - Wordplay]

This is like the first time am actually keeping up with the FIFA and am all for England this year baby!Why you ask?Well its non other than cause they have the cutest players around!!...ok I know isnt a great reason to support a team but what the hell..England RockZz!!

I watched last nite's game which was England vs. T&T but slept after halftime and they only scored after halftime...BAH...

Finally finished my "Memoirs of a Geisha" and it's a pretty good book.Kinda sad and all but it's very intersting with a bit info on Japan's history and all.The book was longish but okies I guess...

My week has been rather..whats the word..yeah..sooopy intersting I guess..loadz of down with the occasion up I suppose.Its times like this that you totally lean on your frenz and am totally lovin them rite now..they being ever so supportive and cheering me up.I've been on the phone with Esther this last two dayz and that gurl knows me ever so well..the other day I greeted her my usually "Hello" and her respond was.."What's wrong,wanna talk bout it?"...lolz...the other best fren...Vitto that is,said I didnt sound my usual way and both was an online conversation..so I guess that sayin that the biggest smile can't fool your best fren is ever so true and they haven't even seen me in quite a while actually..lolz....So shout out to all you guyz...includin Rita and Ben whos been there to listen to me rant and cheerin me up and all...I really aperieacte the love you guyz!!!!!!

So I started this year with the aim of havin a total sweet 16 and it turned out that way until the wind blew in the storm but there's no rainbow without the rain right.So rite now it's time I learn to dance in the rain.I made decisions and I don't regret them.I seriesly fuckin hate regret.It can totally kill a person and it just makes you fustrated.So I'd rather take everything as a lesson.Guess that's why we call our past mistakes "Experience".Makes it sound cooler I guess.You can't hold onto certain things for forever..that's what everyone keeps sayin...it's time to Let Go...and that's what my heart has been tellin me for a long while now.So am going to go with it,knowing that I'll make it though the fall....

You can't look back and regret.

You need to look forward and progress

It's better to forget & be happy than to remember & be sad

The taste of tears is bittersweet tonight

[Mood:Heart Broken]

[Music:Marion Raven - Break You]

As I slowly fall to ground,

This pain has become unbearable,

I should have known,

I really should have.

There's nothing more left to say,

As I bleed little by little,

Someone please kill my misery,

I can't seem to find a way out.

As she watched the glass shatter,
It reminded her of the state of her heart,

She's broken,

And she knows it very well indeed.

That broken piece of glass seems ever so tempting,

She thought bout wantin to watchin herself bleed,

Cause that's how she's feeling on the inside,

And she can't seem to find a way to fix it.

Looks like my heart was right,
And yet again I refused to listen,
Why does a simply word not get to me,
Why does a shattered heart mean experience and then it sinks into me?

Searching for the right

But it keeps avoiding me

It seems that the fucked up wrong really loves my company

My stereo is blasting;

my eyeliner is beginning to smear;

I can barely hear;

My tears are forming in the corner of my eyes,

So just shut up and let me slip.

I can barely hear,

As the lyrics of this song start to make sense,

Caught up with memories,

Slowly fading away.

As she deletes lil memories here and there,

It's time to move along,

There's nothin more to hold on to,

But broken promises and hurtful lies.

In a perfect world,this would never happen

[Mood:Moody]

[Music:Ashlee Simpson - Undiscovered]

Everything happens for a reason,

Things fall apart and can fall into place,

Don't question it, just let it happen,

If it`s meant to be, it will find a way.

Love, life, it's all the same,

The falling is easy,

It's getting up that's a pain.

A sad thing in life is when you meet someone who means the world to you,

Only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be and you just have to let go.

You don't have to hold onto the pain to hold onto the memory.

Things change + people change,

That doesn't mean to forget the past or try to cover it up,

It simply means move on & treasure all the memories

You're only young once,

Have fun & make mistakes,

But no matter what, regret nothing...

If you think it's time to let go,

Just let go,

There's no point looking back at what you've lost,

For the road was never meant to be traveled backwards.

In this cliche teenage tragedy

[Mood:Tired]

[Music:Nick Lachey - What's Left Of Me]

In conclusion my week has been rather dull with nothin much to do.I miss skool and my usual friday outingz...been tragically bored at home...I watched "She's the Man" the other day..wasn't exactly hilarious but it was cute..I have yetz to watch "Take the lead","The Da Vinci Code","Brokeback Mountain" and "Walk the Line".Oh and I've been havin a sudden urge to catch on "Million Dollar Baby".Btw Ashlee Simpson just realeased a new single and the video is to realeased on June 19....its called "Invisible"..its more of a slow beat track but great lyrics..I love her lyrics...they're usually kinda deep...currently hooked on Pink's Who Knew and Ashlee's Undiscovered.But more on the Pink tune...bah...

My weekend was quiet.Saturday was a just a total sit at home thing and on Sunday was me being in a very bad mood.My mum kept askin what I kept being distracted and my aunt added to it that I've been daydreaming too much throughout the day.It was kinda true actually..I missed playin certain parts durin the service cause I was so totally zoning out....and cause of all that crap..I got a darn loadz of lectures through the day..I mean as it I was a havin a fucked up day and everyone just had to pile on it.I hoped they would leave me alone or either I would feel better and thank goodness quesadillas and tacos did the trick...Gosh I love mexican food...

It's been one week officially and am trying.I've been piling myself with quotes and I've been hit with loadz actually.Mostly with main topics on how I would never get back this my teenhood again and that life can only lived once and that I should make the best out it.Thinkin bout it actually...how colourless would it would it be without the tears,pain and heartbreak.If everything was perfect,we would complain how fuckin borin it is and when theres too much goin on,we want to wish it all away...we're really odd beingz.It's the balance that keeps us going I guess and anywayz heartbreak makes great writing material.

Here is Pink's Who Knew...

You took my hand

You showed me how

You promised me you'd be around

Uh huh

That's right

I took your words

And I believed

In everything

You said to me

Yeah huh

That's right

If someone said three years from now,

You'd be long gone

I'd stand up and punch them up

Cause they're all wrong

I know better

Cause you said forever

And ever

Who knew

Remember when we were such fools

And so convinced and just too cool

Oh no

No no

I wish I could touch you again

I wish I could still call you friend

I'd give anything

When someone said count your blessings now

For they're long gone

I guess I just didn't know how I was all wrong

They knew better

Still you said forever

And ever

Who knew

Yeah yeah

I'll keep you locked in my head

Until we meet again

Until we

Until we meet again

And I won't forget you my friend

What happened

If someone said three years from now

You'd be long goneI'd stand up and punch them out

Cause they're all wrong and

That last kiss I'll cherish

Until we meet again

And time makes

It harder I wish I could remember

But I keep Your memory

You visit me in my sleep

My darling

Who knew

My darling

My darling

Who knew

My darling

I miss you

My darling

Who knew

Who knew

P.S:Thankz to all my darlin frenz for being totally suportive lately.Thankz Esther for the cards,they were totally sweet and to Rita for the poem..I heart tht!To Kc for listening to me blab away and being there.Vitz and Daniel for hearin me yap even more.Oh and to Ben for the song recomendation...lolz...Also To everyone else for just being there for me,its means ever so much dearies......Love ya loadz!!!Muax~

Is She Broken?--Maybe;Does it Hurt?--Like Crazy

[Mood:Upset]
[Music:Sum 41 - Pieces]

These last couple of dayz have been hard.I had a short 2 day getaway but that didn't help to much.I laughed when everyone was around but ran away and cried when no one was looking.I didnt know I kept so much memories and held lil things so close.I have memories with Mcdonald's sundae to the very way I say the word "irrating"....close frenz say stay strong,some say you'll make through and I know I would but for now the only thing I keep askin myself is......How long am I gonna feel this way?

Am broken up,
Torn and hurt,
And bleeding a lil more each day,
Plez don't fuckin bother bout the pieces,
For I won't know what to do with them.

Yes I do know how it feels,
To sit on the edge of your bed,
Listening to a sad song and wishing,
It would all just end.

The higher you build the walls around your heart,
The harder you fall when someone tears them down

All of these changes make me cry. I wish we had never said goodbye.

We attach ourselves so closely to people;
That when they are gone;a part of us is gone too.

Here I am starin at these same four walls alone again....

[Mood:Depressed]

[Music: Lindsay Lohan - Over]

Last Friday there was this inter skool debate and I was kinda late for skool but thank goodness I got there in time for the seniors debate or else I bet Kc would have killed me..lol....and when I get there..check out our convo..

Kc:*Waves*...Heyz,you look really nice 2day and ur glowing all over with signs of love..

Me:*Waves back*...Really?....Is it that obvious?

She kept sayin that it totally shows and that am even humming a lot these dayz..lolz...newayz the debate was intersting and the other skools were very agressive but sadly our skool lost.That day I met a couple of frenz I haven't seen for a few years and it was really good to see them.We talked bout the past and recapped great memories,our crushes and confirmed old rumours.I was havin such a good time that I missed lunch and all..lolz but the scheulede for that day was kinda flexible so it wasn't too bad.The rest of the day was spent with my best fren.....we talked a lotz bout our future,boyz and well more boyz..lolz..we stayed back till bout 4 somethin and was annoyin Eddy..the poor dude and the torture he goes through but even when we're totally insultin him,all he does is smile...his totally sportin..lolz...after skool went out for a bitz,came home and headed for the usual family thing.We just had dinner and came home...I was totally worn out after the longish day..

Headed to my grandparents place that morning.Was kinda bored there.We went around the town for a bit and I tried sushi and no I don't really like them..those thingz are totally tasteless...*sheesh*....headed home at nite but reached home only at around 11 cause the stupid highway was jammed...

Well I knew I was gonna have a loong and totally depressin Sunday and as usual my instincts were rite.I really hate goodbyes espeacially when there no "cya soon" around.It's was darn hard tellin someone good bye when you've known them pratically all your life.I was chokin my tears for the whole day and I tried my very best to go by the day with a smile so I won't get questions.My sis was sweet to try to make me feel better cause she was the only one at home that knew what I was going through.My mum had a slight feeling that I wasn't in too good shape either I guess cause she asked if I was ok and all and as usual I gave her the rest assured "of course".I was up till bout 1 in the mornin...figurin out why nothing good lasts long and I worked so hard for this and it wasn't suppose to end this way.After all we've goin through...it really wasn't suppose to be this way....

I woke up and the first thing that came to me was if yesterdays events was just another dream.Then reality sank in I suppose.You really can't play pretend for long at this age no matter how hard you try.I look like some racoon for am overcaffained,tired and havin this bad headache.If only there was a way to make me feel numb....but thank goodness for my frenz..what would I do without em'...Esther always knows when somethingz wrong...she just knows how 2 read me I guess...she called and said I sounded bad...we talked and she did make me feel better.She says I need a getaway..I think that 2.....but rite now all I want is to find hope...a ray of light that I would feel better soon...I really want to feel better but I suppose time heals....for I can't take this pain nomore.....It's slowly killin me on the inside and am fighting so hard that there'll be no signs on the outside....

If only the good things lasted longer,

If only we didn't have to say goodbye.

We can say goodbye now if that's what we have to do,

But here in my heart,

I'm still holding on to you.

Meeting you was fate,

Becoming your friend was a choice,

But falling in love with you was beyond my control.

I love you

For I Know Am Gonna Miss You

[Mood:Sad]

[Music:James Blunt - Tears and Rain]

All those wonderful memories together,
Spending time laughing and smiling,
Giggling and flirting,
They mean so much to me,
Those Christmas times where we got to spend those extra quality time,
By giving excuses of learning new songs,
The late night chats of getting to know each other,
Those silly little fights that always made us laugh a few dayz later,
Am gonna miss all of that,
Cause you make my weekends a little special all the time,
The thoughts of being able to see you on a Saturday nite makes me go to sleep smiling,
All those excuses we made,
So we can spend time of the phone,
I guess this is called life,
Where you've got to let go of some thingz,
And be mature bout it,
For I really am trying,
But I don't seem to be doing to well though,
I can't seem to sit alone without tears in my eyes,
For I haven't really learned on how to deal with change,

Looks like there's gonna be less of seeing you,
You know I always taught we're gonna have times times like that,
But I guess that's what I hoped for,
Your really special to me,
And I have no idea how to explain that,
All I know is you mean a lot to me,

And I love you so much,
Even as write this I have tears in my eyes,
Cause I know my darling that am gonna miss you,
Miss you ever sooo sooo much............

From Here It's All Bout Learning To Dance In The Rain

[Mood:Bored]

[Music: Snow Patrol - Run]

So on Friday there was this field trip sorta thing to a recording studio.Headed for breakfast at some mamak shop and meet the gang.At breakie,Kc and I made a deal that we were going to have laodz of fun that day cause we both needed it ever so badly.She was on the phone with me last nite and I told her I was going to make sure she had a good time the next day but it turned outz I needed to have a good old day outz to cheer me up.After breakie,we headed to the studio.It wasnt too large but it was okies.There was some really cool equiment and all.While waiting for them to set up,we were listening to Kah Weng play "Kelly Clarkson's-Because of You"....that boy has talent,he could play by hearing!Newayz after that the guy in charge of the studio who was a music producer as well briefed us on what goes on and how recording is done and all.And then we got to do our own lil recording...that was really super fun!We kept camera-whoring as well...so will loadz pics as soon as I get them from Samuel........by afternoon we headed for lunch and headed back to skool.Chapel was okies but didnt pay much attention cause Kc and I were talkin and all cause we had to catch up on 2 weeks tales cause we didn't see each other for tht long.....and the whole back row seemed to busy yappin away as well.And thank goodness none of the teachers noticed either.....

After skool headed to Christine's place cause my mum couldn't pick me up at that time.So hanged there and ate a lotz..that alwayz happens when I go to her place..lol..I really needed to talk to someone that day and Christine is definately a great listener.So thankz a lotz gurl,love ya!!Newayz later came home and rushed off to KL.Had dinner at some Italian restaurant.They have the best spagetti's and they had this really intersting desert which was a pancake with loadz of vanilla ice-cream...that was really good and so was their iced cappacino with whip cream..Heavenly!..that was my 2nd glass of coffee for the day btw....it's just that caffaine gives me extra energy!..lol....Then did a little walking around and came home bout midnight.

Woke up around 11 in the morning cause I was really drained out from the day before.Hanged online and then headed to the pyramid.Did some shoppin and got 2 really cute tops!!Had dinner and come home round 8.Hanged on the phone with my baby till bout 10 something.We alwayz seem to loose track of time when we're on the phone(:P).....practiced the organ for a bit after that and then just listened to some tunes till bout 1..

Church was kinda fun actually!....something totally unexpected happened...okies like really really unexpected but it was all good.Went to the mall later and got a new tankini!!!I needed one so much and it's my fav colour.It's black and red.Now all I need for my beach vaca is a new pair of shades.I just learned the other day that next month am goin for a 5 day vaca to some beach area.So am totally physced bout that...I love beachs!!!!!....Came home and onlined after that and then my dad decided to help me get the kittens off my roof.Yes the cat had kittens on my roof and they've been rather noisy.I really couldn't stand it and so we took them down.Am not much of a cat person but those kittens were rather adorable!Returned them to their mum later who seemed rather ficious.The rest of the evening was rather quite and boring.Did notta much but watch tv and listen to tunes.

My day seems to be rather quiet today.I've just been doin some skool work and downloading previous episodes of laguna beach.....it's rather sad that there's no new season for that but the good news is CBS has confirmed a season 4 for OTH!!! Can't wait!

You make me smile,

Even when your not trying.

Your life lies before you like freshly fallen snow.

Be careful where you step because every step will show.

Over the hills and far away

[Mood:Lovey-dovey]
[Music:Faith Hill - Breath]

"Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess who lived in a kingdom far, far away. And in that kingdom there also lived a Boy, and the princess loved that Boy. And so the two decided to marry. Now in this kingdom, all is not well. So the princess and The Boy were set to be wed. And because she was a princess, the call went out for a beautiful gown. Now as the wedding day approached, the princess worried about the evil king, because although he had not always been this way his heart had turned dark and his kingdom had grown to fear and despise him. In the days before the wedding, the king surprised the princess and gave his blessing to the marriage. But the princess was still torn. Even though she had found her true love, it would mean that she would have to leave her faithful handmaiden behind forever. On the eve of the princess's wedding a lavish feast was arranged. Friends and royalty were summoned from lands far away to join the happy couple for a night of laugher and magic. As the night wore on, a calm fell upon the land. All was right in the world. If only for a moment. Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far away, there lived a beautiful princess who loved a Boy. But the people have their struggles, as all people do. And they had grown to fear and despise the king whose heart had turned dark. But in the end, the love between the princess and the Boy was undeniable and true. And over time that love would see them through anything. Magical things happened to them, things they couldn't explain, much like love itself. And like most fairy tales, the princess and the Boy lived happily ever after......at least I hope they do"

--One Tree Hill--

"Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swaps of the not-quite, the not-yet, and the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved and have never been able to reach. The world you desire can be won. It exists.. it is real.. it is possible.. it's yours." -- Ayn Rand, "Atlas Shrugged"

~XoxO~

Simple Yetz Sweet

[Mood:Tired]

[Music:The Wreckers ft. Santana - I'm Feeling You]

So since Friday was a public holiday.My family decided to do the trado thing of picking a town and spending the whole day there.This time we decided to go to Ipoh.It was a nice scenic drive and the town was rather cute.It's has some nice shoppin places and great food!This is the 1st place we went to tht I actually liked.Spent the day at a water park there.The park is located in the middle of a chain of mountains so the area is real cooling and beautiful.In the evening we did a little shoppin here and there and had dinner.It was a nice day in all.Spendin time with the family was kinda nice.

I woke up back with my cold again.That's cause I spent a whole lotz of time in the rain the day before.Did some skool work in the morning and some chattin.In the evening my and sis and I went to City Harvest cause they were havin a musical play.It was very good!Went to the mamak with the cell group later and came home at 1 in the morning.Slept at nearly 2

It was miracle how I woke up precisely 8 that morning.Headed to church and went to the mall after that.Had lunch at Coca and came home and slept.Later in the evening headed to my aun't for dinner.Sadly Alanso won yesterday's race.I thought it was gonna be another Ferari win...*sheesh*....came home and onlined till bout 1.

Spent my morning with my darlin'.And did some studies and so here I am!Currently downloading "One Tree Hill's " season finale.Its sad that its over so fast.Am REALLY hoping for season 4 though it hasn't been confirmed.They better came up with a season 4!!!

"A priceless moment is when the person you've fallen in love with looks you right in the eyes
and

tells you that they're falling in love with you too."

We commited the perfect crime,

You stole my heart,

And I stole yours.

Good old country tunes

[Mood:Sleepy]

[Music: Rascal Flatts - Mayberry]

Well dearies,these last few dayz have been rather dull.I've been down with the cold after such a looogish time.So I've spendin my dayz sleepin a lotz.And that's not too good for me since am not a very excercising person...lolz...newayz these last couple of dayz I've been takin loadz of interest in country music.I got hooked on it cause of my dad.When I started developing interest in music,I use to listen to what my dad use to listen a lot.His into country and all.So that means I was into Shania Twain,Faith Hill and stuff like that.So ever since I've alwayz had love for country tunes.So recently I've been listening to a lot of Rascal Flatts,Keith Urban and KT Tunstall.Rascal Flatt is just a really great country band.They have some darn good songz and lovely lyrics.That's the best part bout country songz,they have really beautiful heartfelt lyrics that really make you think you know.....there's this song by them called "What hurts the most?" and it's been climbing the charts like crazy lately(I have music charts on my homepage ppl thts how I know..lol).So decided to give it a listen and by accident I downloaded the video.It turned out to be one of the best videos I've seen.It was like a movie in a 5 minute video.If you get a chance,do watch it.It makes you really appereacite life and it reminds that we should treasure every moment spent with people we love and to alwayz tell them they way we feel cause you never know what tomorrow brings.This was the first time that a video made me cry.It's a really beautiful tune.

Besides that,Keith Urban sounds sexy as usual.He has some really nice tunes 2.And his just so hot!!..(:P)...and then there's KT Tunstall...am not sure if she's country but I heard her song on American Idol,its called "Black horse and a cherry tree".Katherine Mcphee sang it last week.It's a fun song to dance around to though.

So I guess the last couple of dayz was spent around my music.It's just been rather slow but weekends alwayz seem to pick up the pace.

~Loves~

"Well I miss mayberry,

Sitting on the poach drinking ice cold cherry,

Where everthing is black and white."

-Rascal Flatts-

Live in the moment and never dwell on the past

[Mood:Sick]

[Music:Rascal Flatts - Feels Like Today]

One dose to make me feel well,

A little extra to drown the pain,

It's hard to hide these tears,

So it's better if I just remember bout them in my dreams.

Every word said carries so much meaning,

And each time its said,

It sinks down someone's soul,

So use every word with much thought.

Sometimes being so near,

May seem so far,

Cause there was much held back,

So alwayz let your heart speak for you.

I don't do well with change,

For I feel its breeze passin through,

With change comes so much more,

And I really don't want to know.

The best things in life don't happen unless you take risks.

Risk yourself and throw your heart out onto the table

Let yourself risk getting hurt,

Let yourself try something new.

Follow your heart and do what you feel is right

Fall in love; take a chance.

Hope the other person feels the same. love is a risk,

It could bring either happiness or pain.

Sometimes both.

Life is a gamble, you never know what it'll bring.

Live in the moment and never dwell on the past.

Every Moment Is Meant To Be Treasured

[Mood:Romantic]
[Music: Keith Urban - I Wanna Be Your Everything]

This Friday was definately intersting and super fun!Went to skool around 10 something and hanged around for a while.There was gonna be a debate that day and since am in the team I was suppose to do some research and all but I kinda got an exception that day cause we didn't really get the chance to met and discuss.And so the rest of the day was pretty much the usual and the debate was totally hilarious..The topic was that "Development destroys the environment."The guyz team for the seniors didn't really prepare and they put all kindz of weird ideas out there like cars running on milk one day and all...talk bout out of the extraordianry..lolz...the junior teams were kinda good as well and as usually Vitz the comedian was all blur on the stand.He did his homework but was super blur and lost....lolz...so skool finished late cause of that and I kept rushing Christine cause I was late to met my bf....this is the second time I was late...*sheesh*..newyz

I reached at the mall bout 15 minutes late or more cause I didn't really keep track of time.Setteled my sis with her frenz and all..more actually of my frenz but what the heck...so he was waiting for me with a newspaper in his hand and when asked why he said he wanted to look intelluctual..lolz..boyz!...the movie was pretty good...we watched M.I 3...Tom Cruise is really cute in it! and the speacial effects are darn but the thing is I kinda got distracted quite a bit durin the flick and all(:P)...we grabbed a bite after that and had our usual which is fries and ice-cream.My fav combo!....we decided to go for a bit of window shoppin after that actually more of me draggin him along..lol...there wasnt much to look at so we hanged around and talked and all...

Hanged at the mall till bout 8 cause my sis was watchin "She's the Man" and that started out late.My parents picked us up and we grabbed dinner after that.Came home and then watched "American Idol" cause I've already missed 2 weeks.This year contestant's are really good but it was sad to see Paris go.She's really talented for 17.But my fav is definately Chris!!That rocker guy just so rockz.Guess the finals is gonna be him and Katharine.Btw guyz the finals is gonna be on May 26.

So my day was just really good overall.Got to spend time with people I really love and all.Lately I've just really been enjoying life so much cause I know this years are never gonna come back so am enjoy the best of it!

So let's dance under the stars and
kiss in the pouring rain. cuddle in the
movies and cherish every moment spent.

Its The Way You Hold Me,Kiss Me And Love Me,
That Makes Me Dream Of You Each Night,
And Wake Up Smiling In The Morning.

Its Just One Those Dayz Where It All Just Seems Dark

[Mood:Sleepy]

[Music:Alanis Morissette - Everything]

My Tuesday wasn't too good.It kinda sucked actually.I was in a totally bad mood and I had no idea why.It just seemed that everything was goin downhill that day and I just kept snarling at quite a few ppl speacially my mum and sis.Everything just seemed to be very dark that day and am sorry to all those I tortured...really didnt mean to.I felt ever so lonely and just felt like crying for no apperant reason.That nite the only thing that I knew would clear my mind was to write and thank goodness it did clear my head a little.I prayed so hard that nite that those feelingz would leave before the sun rises the next day.I really cound't stand it and I couldnt find the reason why and that got me just fuckin fustrated.It just felt that those feelingz were never gonna go away and I wanted to find hope around somewhere.It just felt that I was out in the cold and I've gotta pick myself and walk in the pain for a very long time.

Embracing those feelingz that day was so hard for me and I felt I had to deal with it all by myself....

So here's a little something of what I wrote that nite

I pray ever so hard,

That I won't feel this way again,

I really wanna just get rid of it all,

And smile again to a new morning.

Numbness is slowly sinking in,

And all I want to feel is love,

The meaning of that seem to have withered away today,

And all I wanna do is sit by my corner and cry.

Is there an alwayz,

And has forever lost it meaning,

No one wants to be alone,

But sometimes we just are.

Yet more of busy dayz

[Mood:Bored]

[Music: The Killers - Somebody Told Me]

So here's an update on my weeks events...

From Monday to Wednesday,it was at its usual with nothing more.On Thurday,I had organ lessons and the teacher decided to excercise his vocal chords that day cause my lack of practice.And I realized that day tht it's time I put some sorta effort into this or else am gonna dread every Thursday...*sheesh*....and the event that saved that day was shoppin!...thank goodness I had some time for this..I got a really cute black top,a earing and some bangles that day..tht was kinda fun...the rest of the day was casual...

Skool was okies on Friday.Normal..Normal...came home around 5 and then went for a movie and a dinner that nite..dinner was fun cause the restaurant had this really cool chocolate fountain and all..so tht was fun..lolz...was kinda tired that night so slept early cause I was goin to have a long Saturday...

Woke up at 7:30 on Saturday mornin..yeah ur readin rite...7:30!!!..Am never up at this time usually so it was kinda weird,felt like another weekday and all...went over to Christine's place and left for the conference at bout 9 something..the whole event was good..justa whole bunch and gurlz and all..tht was nice..went back to Christine's at bout 4 something..chilled around and went to service after that..I came home around 11 something..had a pretty good day..

My Sunday was really tirin.I was totally worn outz from the day before.Church was usual and went over to my aunt's later and then came home and slept till late evening.Had a dinner that evening with the extended family cause my uncle was leavin to U.S that day.. so yeah...came home and did notta...I just slept somemore actually...

Monday was such a relaxed day.Woke up round 11 a.m,that lazed around the house.My whole family watched the "Perfect Man" with me and my sis.And they actually liked it..lolz..went over to my aunt's that evening and came home kinda late...

That's bout it I guess..it was pretty simple but it was all good...really tirin though..

There are 6 billion people on this world but sometimes all you need is ONE

~HuGz~

One of the best weekends ever!

[Mood: Tired/Happy]

[Music: Jessica Simpson- With You]

My friday was very cas.The day went by in its usual manner.The only weird thing was that I kept hittin Vitto through out the day and he just came and hugged me...*Bizzare*.....LOL....After so long teacher Ben lee spoke..tht was good..the rest of day was spent with my best fren.Since we haven't seen each other in 2 weeks.There was sooooo much to catch up on.Came home,chilled outz and then went for some family dinner thing which was pretty much a bore.Came home and slept early.I consider 12am early btw.....

So early yesterday my sister was jumping around cause she had tickets for the Click Five concert and I was suppose to go to a fren's birthday party at a ktv(which am sooo sorry I didn't call you guyz and tell you I wasn't attendin..am soo sorry!!)....But that mornin a few of her frenz backed out and there was tickets for me and a few frenz.Totally excited,I messaged my bf that mornin and told him to come.So headed to Lagoon in the afternoon and hung around the park with my sis,her fren and mum.When we reached there,did I relealize that it was the Quicksilves Revolution Tour.I had no idea that this thing was gonna be at the theme park and so I didnt bring the neccesaties...*sheesh*.....okies so halfway through I was gettin totally bored...and then at bout 4 somethin,my bf and his fren came...shes a really nice gurl btw..very friendly....newayz I was overjoyed cause the boredom was really gettin to me......we headed for a few rides..the really mild ones though..lol...we met up with more of his frenz..a nice,fun bunch..and then we decided to split from the group for a while and take a walk... it's really pretty in the evenin on the suspension bridge btw...and then we just hang around the beach area...talkin and all(:P)...while waiting for the concert to start...it was nice to sit down and have a talk...real romantic (:P)...so the concert started bout 9 and it was sad cause I have Click Five's cd but I never really listened to it..so note to self:Listen throughly to all the cd's I get!.....sadly I only got to stay for half of the concert but the Click Five totally rocked the stage...the lead singer looks so much cuter live!!!...lolz... cause my tansport home who was my sis's fren's dad came early so I had to go home half way through the show....was so fuckin worn out when I came back but I had one hell of a good time!!...

So Sunday I was so tired that mornin but thank goodness I managed to drag myself from bed and off to church and I managed to play the organ without sleeping on it.After church headed off to Mid Valley and had lunch at Chilli's...Love tht place!..came home bout 3 something and slept till bout 7.After that watched "Constantine"...thts a pretty good flick btw... and then hanged online for a bit and watched "A Walk To Remember"...tht movie alwayz makes me tear..this time it definately made me more than just tear..lolz...slept around 1..

So my weekend was definately a blast.Saw a band live,hanged with frenz and partyed.It was all darn good!!!

Every moment I spend with you,

I treasure ever so much,

You make me feel thingz that I've never felt before,

And when am with you,

It seems like I can spend forever in your arms,

Baby you've swept me off my feet,

And am fallin rite into ur arms,

For that moment,

It seemed like we were the only ones around,

And everyone else seemed to have disappered in the background,

The day felt ever so magical,

I love the way you make me smile,

And the way you hold me,

For I just love the way you love me.

High walls and running

[Mood: Happy]
[Music: Bethany Joy Lenz - Halo]

First it's all about takin chances,
Cause you never know where they'll take you,
When we've taken the wrong turn,
And get hurt,
That's when we decide to build thick,high walls.

Maybe it's the fear of being vunerable,
Or because of a hard lesson learned,
But I've found out that it's all bout followin your heart,
Even if it means breaking the rules.

I tried running away many times,
And I guess I hoped that someone would run after me just for once
And you did that,
You broke down the walls that I built,
That's when I decided to let you in.

Some people put up walls, not to keep people out,
But to see who cares enough to break them down.

Am no longer feel insecure,
And it's such a calm feeling,
For I know now,
That you'll catch me as I fall

Exercisin wasn't suppose to hurt

[Mood: In Pain]

[Music: Nickleback - Savin' Me]

I thought exercising was suppose to be good for ya but who the hell knew its gonna hurt this bad.Went over to my cousin's place yesterday and she dragged me to play a game of badminton with her and since I haven't played in ages,I decided to see how bad I suck at it but as it turned out I wasn't too bad actually.Earlier in the day didn't do much actually,did a bit of studying and a lot of layin around doin notta.

Came home feelin slightly sore but not too bad.Did a bit of readin and then headed off for dinner.I've been drinkin lotsa 100 Plus lately.Not really sure why though.Came home,missed 'Lost" so I totally gotta catch the rerun this Sunday or somethin.And went off to bed...I was just tired...

Woke up this mornin feelin so fuckin sore.I was pratically draggin my self around.Had tuition,did more math....am startin to seriesly hate tht subject...I just can't get that stuff right sometimes....*sheesh*......the rest of the day was such a drag...I slept durin most of it....

"Give all to love;
Obey thy heart;
Friends, kindred, days,
Estate, good fame,
Plans, credit, and the muse;
Nothing refuse."

By Ralph Waldo Emerson

The Ultimate Act of love that had the greatest impact on the world

[Mood: Tired/Cheery]

[Music: Planetshakers - All I Want Is You]

As it was Good Friday this week,there was no skool.So I spent my day partially studying,onlining and on the phone.At nite I went to church for Good Friday service and I had a good time..I was just in a very good mood that day cause a certain someone decided to be such a darlin!....hehehehe.....anywayz it rained as usual,the way it alwayz does on Good Friday...it reminds us that Our Saviour died on this very day all for love....the ultimate act of love....

On Saturday,didnt do much either.Just the usual.Hanged around the house doin nothing actually.In the evening went over to Christine's and waitied for a couple of ppl to come and all.Then Christine's sis..Josephine took us there.The place was jam packed when we arrivied and service didnt even start yetz.The main whole was packed and there was bout 100 people waitin in the lobby.Had a really good time! The Pastor spoke bout the road to our destiny.It was real good.There were bout 10 to 12 people from our skool.We had dinner and was hangin around till bout 11 somethin.And then Christine's sis took us home and since Christine and I was in the car 2gether,we kept laughin so much and poor Josephine couldnt hear Timothy give directions to his house...it was fun..lolz...I reached home bout 12 and was totally worn outz.....

I have no idea how I work up precisely at 8 in the mornin but was kinda tired.Headed to Christine's place and waited there till bout 10.Went to church at bout 10 somethin.Service ended around 12 somethin and there were more ppl from skool 2day.We took pics and all.Had lunch and sat in camp fire position...lolz....oh and a fren of mine..we've been in the same skool for a few years but his not a christian but finally yesterday when they had an altar call..he took the move and went..I was really soo happy for him..after a couple of years..his made the move to give his life to Jesus...all of us were really glad for him.....so we had lunch and after that I headed home,rushed like mad cause we were late to go to our grandparents place cause there was dinner sorta thing that evening...I was runnin low on energy by then...came home at bout 12 that nite and after that I headed to bed...was ever so tired...

Woke up at 11 this mornin..dad decided to be gracious this mornin I guess...well I gotta go do some skool work...my week of vaca is officialy over...

He died on the cross for you and me,

He suffered ever so much,

And all for the sake of love,

The one pure,true love,

Love that impacted the world and touched many lives,

He loves us in the way that words can't describe,

And all He wants back is our love,

And to walk the path He has planned for us,

So that we may have abundant life.

He died for you,why not live for Him?

My dear little corner

[Mood: Lonely]

[Music: Crossfade - Cold]

Am in a small little corner,

Shiverin slightly in the light cold breeze,

So many thoughts are lingerin in my mind,

And am not sure which one to deal with first.

For I want everythin in my mind to disappear,

So I can run along carefree,

Thingz were so much easier back then,

When the biggest problem was learnin to write your name.

I just want a hug,

A hug to make all this disapper,

To be held and never let go,

To be held close and be told that everything will be alrite.

Maybe I should find a cosier corner,

And stay there till am ready to come out,

Fo right now I just want to hold on this feelin.

Life is a balance of holding on and letting go

It's was a sweet old day

[Mood: Cheery]

[Music:Carrie Underwood - Jesus Take The Wheel]

The day started off with tuition and then some time online.Headed off to Esther's house later in the mornin.We were messin around with her computer and her music collection.I gotta get that Carrie Underwood cd from her,its sounds really good btw...has tht country feel to it.Then we walked to Mc'ds and had lunch...its kinda of our routine everytime I go to her place.We had the usual round of burgers,fries and ice-cream.We don't usually count calories when we go out cause we don't notice how much we eat when we talk...lolz....we were talkin bout the teens in hollywood and ideal husbands(:P)......we like talkin bout the future a lot....its weird tht way...

So we came home and chilled around for a while and then we went out with her mum to get ingredients for the cookies we were goin to bake.Took a while to decide if we were goin 2 use hershey or cadbury chocolate and then her mum suggested cooking chocolate..lolz....came home around 3 somethin and we practically had home economic lessons....it was fun!!...we kept talkin and laughin a lot..it was nice 2 spend time with her after such a long time....guess we both felt the drift and all......then she had 2 go for violin lessons and I hanged online with my pet sis and watched "The Nanny"..its an old sitcom..use 2 watch it when I was younger..anywayz we went 2 pick her from her lessons and then we went for dinner....came back and my mum was there by then...just came home btw and so here I am..

It was a really good day.I had a great time!!.....I think I should do this more often....am gonna go check on my one tree hill episode....I wasted a whole freakin day downloadin the wrong one!!...*Sheesh*...

Since You've Been Gone

[Mood: Still worn outz]

[Music: Kelly Clarkson - Since You Been Gone]

I can't believe,
For I am in disbelief,
I trusted you,
So much for that matter,
But you've proved me wrong yet again,
Guess am getting use to this,
But there are no more tears to cry,
And ain't gonna waste my time cryin anymore,

Am done here,
For it's not something new,
In my heart, I knew
I knew you would tell me this one day,

It was just a matter of time,
So thank you for all the great times we had,
For breakin my heart and watchin me fall apart,
For no one has hurt me the way you did,

I bet it was fun,
And you had a good time
But I don't reget,
I learned a lot from you,
And am grateful in a way for all the lessons,
But as usually behind every lesson,
There are marks,

Marks you can't erase and you'll carry around for the rest of your life,
For experience is a hard teacher

It gives you the test first
And the lesson much later.

You dedicated,

You took the time,

And it wasn't long till I called you mine,

But all you ever heard me say is how I pictured me with you,

That's all you heard me say,

But since you've been gone,

I can breath for first time,

And am so movin on,

Thankz to you,

Now I can get what I want,

Since you've been gone

Smooth Sailin

[Mood: Totally Worn Out]

[Music: Goo Goo Dolls - Name]

It was kinda of a vacation this weekend and thank goodness cause I needed it ever so badly.My friday was rather quiet.It was the usual and a little more here and there.So it was pretty fun.Stayed at home for the evening and packed for the next day cause I was goin away for the weekend to the beach.Watched "Cheeper By The Dozen" that night.It was a good family flick but Hilary Duff looks really bad here.She's lost just wayy wayy too much weight.But over all its a nice movie to watch with the family.After that Kc and I were on the phone till bout 12.That was rather fun!

Woke up bout 8 and the house was bustling as everyone got ready and got their luggage into the car.We had breakfast at a restaurant and headed off by 9 somethin.So had lunch at my grandma's place and then the whole family left to the beach at nearly 2 somethin.The hotel was okies and the pool was great.The best part was when we were at the pool,it started pourin rather heavily and I got to chill in the rain(alwayz wanted 2 do tht!!).After tht was rather worn outz and had a good chinese dinner.Slept at around 12.

As it was Palm Sunday,the family decided to go to church and we went 2 my grandma's church.Later we had lunch and decided to hang outz at the beach.Was there till bout 6 somethin.Went for a boat ride and swam.Btw the beach looks really beautiful when the sun sets.It really lights up the horizon......loved the view of that.....

Went back to my grandma's place and then we went out for dinner.For chinese yetz again...I have no idea but the family tends to like Chinse food a lotz...lolz...Finished nearly round 10 and everyone headed home.Was totally tired outz when I come home.

Cause we were all really worn outz,my dad decided to let us sleep in late till bout 10 somethin.I really needed the extra sleep though am still tired...

Well the rest of my week was pretty uneventful but there was the usually highlights.Watched "Ice Age" on Thurday.It was nice but I felt not as good as the 1st.Besides tht notta much I guess.The vacation was really good for me.I had loadz of time to think thingz through and plan where I wanted to go from here.I really needed to get everything sorted out and all.And I just hope,it'll be smooth sailin from here...at least for a while.....

Is it suppose to be this way?

[Mood: Poetic]

[Music: Westlife - You Raise Me Up]

It's been all bout growning up,

For am tryin to find a way to stop time,

I want everything to come to halt,

So I sink into every moment bit by bit.

I don't wanna let go of some much,

Cause I love this sense of secruity,

Please don't go,

And leave me all out here in the cold.

Am lovin this feelingz,

Of love and care,

I never wanna let go,

Of all this wonderful dreams.

Is there no way to hold on,

For I suddenly believe in a forever,

If there is hope,

And faith lingers,

There is a forever.

"Let your desires be ruled by reasons"

Cicero

Seemed Intersting

Borrowed this from a frenz site...I was bored...seemed intersting....

1. his hair color? black,brown,redish,blonde,anything is fine cept weird colours like purple or something..
2. his eye color? anything will do..black,blue,green....
3. his height? Definately taller than me
4. does he have a six pack? sure tht wouldnt be a prob
5. is his hair long or short? short
6. does he wear glasses? no probz
7. does he have piercings? wouldnt mind a ear piercin but others maybe I'll mind...
8. does he have scars? sure
9. would he stay on the phone with you until 2 a.m.? that would be fun and sweet
10. is he buff or skinny? kinda buff but not too buff and not too skinny
11.is he funny or serious? Funny but series at times as well
12. does he like to party or stay at home? party a little is fine but not too much and stay at home is all good 2
13. should he cook? tht would be cool
14. should he have a best friend? sure
15. should he have alot of female friends? okies I guess
16. is he outgoing or shy? Outgoin is good but shy at times is kinda cute..(:P)
17. is he sarcastic or sincere? Sincere..but the occasional sacrism is fine...lol
18. should he love his mother? of course
19. should he watch chick flicks? sure..why not..it would be nice 2 watch some movies with him
20. would he be a smoker? its okies I guess but not smoke a whole pack a day and kill himself kinda thing
21. would he drink? Not to the point where he gets drunk all the time and pukes
22. would he swear? sure
23. would he play with your hair? that would be nice..(:P)
24. is his clothes style important? not exactly...but being fashionable ones in a while is good
25. would he pay for somes dates? sure
26. does he kiss on the first date? ummm....
27. would he call you everyday? tht wouldnt be a prob I think
28. would he bring you flowers? That would be sweet,speacially if they were roses
29. would he lay under the stars with you? OF COURSE!!!..thts so romantic...
30. would he write poetry about you? tht would be very cute
31. would he call you baby? of course!
32. would he hang out with you and your friends? sure
33. would you hang out with him and his friends? why not
34. would he walk you to the door at the end? yupz
35. holding hands? a must!
36. does he play soccer? not a problem
37. does he play baseball? sure
38. does he play basketball? no probz
39. does he play football? he could be a sports freak...I wouldnt mind
40. would he have alot of things in common with you? yes and no
41. would he be the type to always tell you his feelings? yea..I like honest guyz
42. would he three-way you with his best guy friend? NO!!!!
43. would he three-way you with his last girlfriend? ewWw!
44. would he sing for you? yea sure...a really romantic song would be nice like a ryan cabrera one
45. is he musical? guiter at the beach or by my window or jammin on the drums would be cool too..wouldnt mind a cute piano player either....
46. would he introduce you to his parents? lolz..why not
47. would he leave you messages for you to wake up to? hugz~
48. is it important to have him in check? hmMm..
49. is he artistic? tht would be cool since am not too artistic
50. if he calls five times a day, do you tell you friends he's sprung? It's okies...I wouldnt really mind....
51. would he talk alot about his ex-girlfriends? sure I guess...
52. would he give you any reason to think he was cheating? ermmm....
53. would he watch the sun rise with you? Hell yeah!!!
54. would he take you for walks in the park? Yea and talk the nite away in his arms...as u can see am a total romantic...hahaha
55. how old is he? just not too old....
56. is he very smart or average? hmmMm...
57. what is the most important thing in a relationship? Honesty,loadz of love,trust,chemistry

Cheers To The Teenage Years

[Mood: Happy]

[Music: Like You - Bow Wow ft. Ciara]

So Friday was pretty casual this week.It was the usual Kc and I yappin for the whole day and we were plannin 2 go outz on Saturday and all.Also a gurl name Yvonne came to our skool and had a talk..she has NS,its a sickness where u have tumors growin in ur body and cause of tht she can't really hear and was unable to walk for a while...it was real beautiful the way she's fightin for life and keepin so strong...I really admire tht cause she's not drowning herself in self-pity....even with her sickness shes a writer and a business student...she come to our skool to sell some t-shirts to raise money for an operation she needs to get down..everyone was kinda inspired in a way from this talk.....so anywayz come home and chilled around the house.Tried persuadin my date 2 go outz on Saturday which he gave me a bizzare reason for not comin and I really thought it was true and it ended bein an early April fool's joke..lol.....Went outz for dinner then and come home and slept....

Woke up nearly 11 in the mornin on Saturday.Was online till bout afternoon and since the date thing was called off,I planned 2 go 2 Christine's church....my mum was kinda shocked tht I switched plans for goin to the mall to church..LOL....went to Christine's house bout 6 and then Sonia,Wesley,Tracy and Nicole joined us.Went there with Sonia's mum.There was loadz of youths there when we reached.Had a hard time keepin track of each other.The guyz came in kinda late and all..the service was really good...the worship was loadz of fun and the senior pastor gave a good sermon bout friendship.....had no idea David Lee could play the drums so well...Esther and I kept checkin and seein if tht was really him since his usually so quite in class and all....finished nearly at 10p.m..the guyz decided 2 go first..so we had dinner and waited to take our group pic so we migled around.At nearly 10 somethin we took our pic and some guy none of us knew decided to join our pic..lol...weird...went home bout 12 and was really worn outz...I had a really good time with my gurlz though....

It was really hard wakin up in the mornin on Sunday,I was really tired.Headed to church and then to the mall for a little shoppin and makin my watch smaller since every I watch I get alwayz seems to be rather too large..Bleh...come home and spent the rest of my day in a "lazy sunday" manner..tht includes readin with my music blarin,sleepin,watchin tv and gettin online...

So my weekend was good in a way....I had fun,looks like my week ahead maybe intersting...well am actually really hopin it is...

Tears,drama and lies...THREE CHEERS TO THE TEENAGE YEARS!!!!!

I've drifting down a river

[Mood: Cheery]

[Music: Fefe Dobson - Everything]

The week has been rather quiet,

With occision events,

But that what makes it intersting I guess,

Life's weird that way.

I realized that the more we fight the closer we become,

Well actually you said that but I like quotin from you sometimes,

Who else am I gonna steal quotes from anywayz,

But you know I realized that's kinda true in a way.

You're very unpredictable most of the time,

I can never know at times what goes on in your head,

Most people I can read,

But just not you.

Maybe that 's why am attracted to you
It's just that you have your way of makin me smile,
Even when I really don't want to,
And the way I can alwayz be honest with you,

That's just speacial,
You're just really speacial to me,
And I want you to know that.

Sweet 16

[Mood: Excited/Happy!!]

[Music: Hilary Duff - Sweet Sixteen]

And so my sweet sixteen celebration started out precisely at saturday.Headed down to the saloon to get my hair curled,not the whole thing though,just the ends and it turned out pretty good but it seriesly was so freakin tirin sittin on that chair. By then I was practically starvin to death cause it was 2pm when it was done and as usually I didnt grab breakfast.Later had lunch and hanged around the house.I got dressed up at bout 5 somethin,really loved the dress and....I decided to put flowers in my hair...I know it isn't really me but hey its "sweet 16".....

It started precisely at 7 and the early ones were Vitz and Sam.Everyone roller kinda later but I forgive you guyz...lolz...poor Denise and Danielle got lost....I had precisely 16 candles on my cake even though the large ones usually represented 10 but wht the heck...lolz.....dinner started out round bout 8 and by then everyone

was there...wesley,daniel,sonia,hannah,sheryln,denise,danielle,christine,

hannah,vitto and sam.I had loadz of fun,we kept laughin so much and crappin as usual....lol.....we were definately the loudest around...it was a total blast..everyone hanged around till bout 10 somethin and then Denise,her sis and Sonia went home 1st.Everyone else stayed round till 11 somethin and Wesley and Daniel decided if they didnt get transport home,they'll have 2 crash in my livin room with Vitto..which was definately a bad idea,especially the vitto part...LOL....the last 2 go was definately Vitto..we were watchin Alien and Predeator cause there was nothin else showin..later I sat up checkin out my presents..got some really cool stuff..cash,Ashlee Simpson's I Am Me(thankz Esther!!),a couple of jewelry items,teddy bears,chocolate,a discman!!..I wanted tht so very much... and loadz more...thankz everyone for ur gifts btw...

Headed to church this morning.Was really tired outz and all but Thank God I played well even though I didnt practice...Headed to the mall after that and did a little shoppin..went home and my parents gave me my gift and I got want I wanted from my wishlist!!..which was really cool since they don't check out my blog and all.....it was GUESS accesories!!!!!..I got a watch and a handbag..TOTALLY AWESOME!!...was checkin out all my greeting testimonials and greeting cards just nowz...they were so very darn sweet!!..thank you so much dearies!!!....loved them..

Well I gotta say ppl this has definately been one hell of a sweet sixteen!!!Really great.Thankz 2 all my family and homies for makin it an aweosme one!!...Loadz of Love...~XoXo~

It's been a very intersting journey so far,

With so many lessons learned,

Gaining much and lossin little,

But there is no regret in all,

All these wonderful memories will alwayz be with me,

Through times of joy and tears,

I've found love both in my family and frenz,

People standin in corners,

Alwayz willin to give me a helpin' hand,

And am indeed very greatful,

From here is gonna be discoverin so much more to life,

And carryin on all that I've learned,

It's the road to a whole new journey,

Livin life to the fullest,

And lovin every part of it

It definately gonna be sweet!!

Nervous,Happy Yetz Excited

[Mood: Nervous]

[Music: Chris Brown - Run It]

Headed to skool 2day.It was really hectic,running around givin out my addy,rememberin who I didn't invite yetz,checkin whos gonna comin and whos not.Then there were people with "whos coming?","is so-so coming","how formal is formal","do u want a teaset?".....tht was from Vitto btw...LOL....and then I was updatin Kc with all the details of my week...so it was really crazy and all 2day but it was good.Check this out...

*Everyone watchin Jarett's magic card trick...Kc and I were watchin*

Vitto: Oh look you guyz are actually not talkin

Me: LOL...yeah...

Kc and I were talkin non stop for nearly the whole day.We alwayz have so much to catch up on Fridayz.So skool was pretty cas for the rest of the day

Am really nervous bout 2moro.Not really sure why though.Feelin weirdly stressed.Maybe am worried if I invitied everyone and all...totally bizzare....lolzz....gonna go find somethin 2 do...kinda bored currently....muax~

Never take life for granted,

Live a little,

Love with everything you have

&

Never give up

It's Cold Out There

[Mood: Down Memory Lane]
[Music: Stray's Don't Sleep - For Blue Skies]

Does this darknesss have a name?
This cruelty, this hatred, how did it find us?
Did it steal into our lives or did we seek it out and embrace it?
What happened to us that now we send our children into the world like we send young men to war,
Hoping for their safe return, but knowing some would be lost along the way.
When did we lose our way?
Consumed by the shadows.
Swallowed whole by the darkness.
Does this darkness have a name?
Is it your name?

Slick and Sweet

[Mood: Cheery]
[Music: Amber Pacific - Poetically Pathetic]

It has been a definate intersting weekend.The camp was fun with its occasional bizzare happenings.But it was nice spendin time with everyone and all.I indeed had fun.Was totally tired outz when I came back yesterday.Watched the beginning of F1,slept and watched the ending.I slept for pretty much the rest of the day and hanged online at nit3zZ..

Today was okies,the usual chattin,listenin to music for the whole day and studyin.That was pretty much it.It was kind of a drag....The highlight for this week is definately goin to be my birthday this weekend...really excited bout it and all...I've been running around checkin with my guest list n all lately...really can't believe am gonna be 16 in a couple of dayz...gosh I feel old..lolz...Well am gonna go watch "Lost".....sadly I missed last week's episode....

Life is not a dress rehersal,
It's the final production,
So make it count.

LOVES!!

I'm caught in between perfect lies and impossible dreams

[Mood: Kinda Bored]

[Music: Lifehouse - Blind]

It was suppose to be sweet,

But currently it just seems messy,

Maybe I need to get my priorities straight,

It's time to rearrange again,

Cause I can't go on livin in a daydream.

The truth usually suxz,

So here I am again,

Talkin to myself,

Tryin ever so hard to find,

Courage,

Strength,

Support,

Will,

And all of that,

I need it all rite nowz,

Just to get by the day.

Confusion seems to take over just way too much lately,

It's been kinda overwhelming sometimes,

I really don't know where to go from here.

Tears Durin The Bitter Rain

[Mood:Emo]

[Music: Marion Raven - Break You]

Lookin at the sky,

It looks rather beautiful as evening turns to night,

The light hits it just right and it looks ever so lovely,

But how many out there lookin at the same beauty with tears in their eyes,

How many have lost someone at that very moment,

Or just have been broken hearted,

And those that have the thought of breakin someone's heart in that very night.

Those that can't stand the world and have suicide in their thoughts,

There are people out there who have lost hope in much,

And can't bare the truth cause it seems so bitter,

Cause somethin so beautiful turned into a hell of a nightmare within a day,

It's sad when you know so much goes on under the same beautiful sky,

So much tears and pain,

Screams that can't be heard,

And a broken heart behind a beautiful smile,

So be nice to everyone you meet,

Cause they're fighting a battle you know absolutely nothing about.

Throwin away every bit of regret

[Mood: Sadly Cheery]

[Music: The Veronicas - Everything I'm Not]

I definately am in need of a distraction,

Cause my emotions are in a whirlwind,

My head is spinning with questions,

And the answers never seem to be good enough

At first I thought am gonna kill the way I really feel with anger,

But that made me feel bitter,

Then I tried running away away from it,

By burying it anyway I can,

But that made it feel worse,

Later I realized I might as well face it nowz,

Cause sooner or later it's gonna get to me,

So for the last few dayz I've decided to face the way I feel,

And deal with it all,

So far it's goin fine,

Cause it's not somethin that hasnt happened before,

And it's not somethin new,

It's a repeat of history,

That happened just way too soon.

Sometimes you have to see the worst,

To apperieacte the bad.

Unoffical Vaca

[Mood: Relaxed]

[Music: Jack's Mannequin - Dark Blue]

Am on unoffcial vaca cause am currently waiting for my new shipment of cd's to come.So on Monday I watched the Oscars live in the morning which was bout 9 A.M and catched the red carpet at night with the family...okies more like they were forced to watched it with me.The Oscars was kinda simple this year.Reese Witherspoon definately wore the best dress.Total vintage! It seems it was some vintage Dior she found in Paris and her friend helped fix it and all ( read it somewhere :P) And the worse must have been Michelle Williams,tht horrible lookin yellow thing..lol...even Charlize Theoron's dress looked weird....the Best song winner was kind of a disappointment expected the track of Brokeback mountain or Memoris of Geisha to win...also thought Brokeback Mountain would win for the movie of the year..*sheesh*..this year's Oscar's was definately borin.....well I plan to watch Brokeback Mountain..I soo wanna watch that..also "Walk the Line","Memoirs of a Geisha" and Munich..I saw the DVD that day but didnt get it.....

Watched Lost at nite.It was good.Seems to be gettin more intersting,hope I'll be able to keep up with it but AXN alwayz has loadz of repeats so I don't think tht'll be a problemo....Didn't do notta much on Tuesday..my rountine these past two dayz and will be for probably the entire week.....wake up around 8,read the paper and listen to the radio till bout 10,watch tv and babysit bro till bout noon.Have lunch,catch up on some readin,be bored durin the evening and watch tv at nite yetz again....am not totally bored outz from this rountine but I definately can't take more then a week of this.....

Am currently showing a bit of interst on the "O.C".Been watchin for 2 weeks in a row but sadly it's not as intersting as One Tree Hill.Guess am still a loyal OTH fan.....

It's All Good

[Mood: Tragically Bored]

[Music: Fall out Boy - Sugar We're Goin Down]

And so my internet has been down for the last couple of dayz and all.So heres an update on my weekend...

Friday was a blast.Went to skool durin break which was pretty late.Kc was there and all.So it was our usual group hangin outz.Kc and I spent practically the whole day talkin bout boyz,boyz and more boyz...lolz...thank goodness I didnt get the " I told you so or didnt I tell this would happen" from either of them.They were totally darlin's and were really supportive and all.But they did hint a little..lol....Check this outz-->

Esther: See thats why I told you say no.You alwayz don't listen to me....

Kc: Well she wanted her own experience in this and she sure learned something.

Me: *Grinz*......Yea thts true.....And in my head *** HELL YEAH!! Of Course I gained experience and learned something from all that....DUH.......maybe I should rethink this whole method of experince gaining wisdom thing.......***

Chapel was okies,the new teacher took over this time.It was ok-ish...Headed home at bout 4 and continued with my "Memoirs of a Gesisha" which is really good btw.Do read it if you get the chance.Very intersting...

My parents decided to go watch "Pink Pather" at nite.So I decided to book the tickets and it actually worked!! Had dinner at Secret Recipe which is one of my fav restaurants! The movie was hilarious but the story was pretty simple.Steve Martin is a darn good comediean......

You know I learned that day that good friends alwayz find their way back to each other.Even after much bickerin and bitchin and all of that.You'll find that you're much closer than before and you just know you'll have each others back.Guess that's one of the many cool parts of life.

The rest of my weekend was spent in front of the tv with a pile of DVD's and quite a bit of babysitting to do.But it was all good.It was a simple but good weekend.

Can't wait to see what the week has in store for me!

Let The Rain Fall Down And Wake My Dreams

[Mood: Confused]

[Music: Evanescene - Goin Under]

Everything happens for a reason.

Things fall apart and can fall into place.

Don't question it, just let it happen.

If it`s meant to be, it will find a way

We live an unforgiving world,
Where we strive to learn,
And hurt for love,
Where nothing can last,
And where forever has no meaning,
We die to live,
And live to die,
We fight for love that takes a lifetime to find,
Where innocence takes a whole new meaning,
And evolves through time.
Where goals seem to be priorities,
And love becomes meaningless,
Where running seems to be unstoppable,
And drowning is just another hobby,
Where crying is an hourly activity,
And heartbrokenness just another trend.
Heartless is what this world is,
Where nothing seems to live with time.

Looking for a Saviour to save my soul,

Cause all the damage I've done has left a big hole.