Dayz are going by empty

[Mood: Bored]
[Music: Jem - They]

Goin to the movies on a Monday is fun.
No lines - no huge headz blockin the screen - no bathroom crowds - and more leg room.
From now onwardz I shall go to the movies only on Monday.
The advantages of homeskooling........
Watched Fantastic Four btw.it was cool,not great but cool,too much yappin too little action.

My week has been very peaceful.Quiet yetz not dull.Uneventful yet calm.

Well I have some skool work 2 attend to.....ciozzz

Thts just my view...

[Mood: Sad]

[Music: Ashlee Simpson- Pieces of Me]

Its hard to find good people in a messed up world,

Where everyone hides their true identity,

But when you dig deep,will you find the truth,

And sometimes the truth hurtz.

Here I am,

Starin at the same window by the kitchen,

I love Ashlee Simpson's lyrics,

They alwayz remind me of wht am goin through,

Love makes the world go round but why is it so hard to find?

If only everyone owned a manuel on how 2 live.

The Perfect life,

Thank God theres no such thing,

For then no one will learn 2 survive.

Am the gurl who shows little outside,

But theres so much within,

I don' throw my feelings out,

I like keepin everything in,

Till someone has the gutz find outz,

Thts the way it is,

Thts the way I am.

Maybe

[Mood: Calm]
[Music: Marion Raven - Here I Am]

My dayz have been very quite lately and I have been very calm.
Everthing seems to be going on smoothly and nothing has been overly dramtic lately.
Thats really good....it really is

I watched "War of the Worlds" last week.Very cool speacial effects and all.A really cool flick.Tom Cruise is such a HOTTIE!!!
LOL
I know his really old..lol...yet his hot.

I guess thts the only intersting thing I did last week......not forgetting tht music talk I went for...it was kinda cool too...

I have organ class today and I have 2 head 2 church in the evening.I've Bible skool work to do today.

So I guess I have 2 start practicing the organ soon and start memorizing some stuff for skool.*siGh*

:+:Maybe it was wrong 2 let you go,
Maybe it was wrong 2 never show,
But sometimes it feels so right,
And maybe wht I did was right. :+:

I won't let you HIDE AWAY

[Mood:Free]
[Music: Hilary Duff - Hide Away]

Hiding Away

Losin' the day

As if it doesn't really matter

Saying Goodbye

Scared to say why

Afraid it will shatter our world

Show me some faith now

Trust me somehow

Why are we keepin' our secret

Why are we hiding ourselves away

Anyway we can hide away

I dont wanna fake it

I wanna make you believe, what I sayI wont let you...hide away

Where do we go

How do we know

What we're ever really after

Sometimes it's clear

When you are here

Nothing can shatter our world

I need some faith now

To trust you somehow

Why are we keepin' our secret

Why are we hiding ourselves away

Anyway we can hide away

I dont wanna fake it

I wanna make you believe what I say I wont let you...hide away

Maybe I, maybe I, maybe I'm losin'

Maybe I, maybe I, maybe I'm OK

Turn around, look around, go around in circles

Dont run away, drift away, dont hide away

Why are we keepin' our secret

Why are we hiding ourselves away

Anyway you can, hide away

I dont wanna fake it

I wanna make you believe what I say

Ohh but I cant

Believe what I said

I wont let you hide away, hide away

Hiding away, losin' my day

As if it doesn't really matter

I won't let you hide away.......

Save me,for I tried

[Mood:Blurry]

[Music: Goo Goo Dolls - Iris]

As I sat on the shore and watched everything around me,

Empty faces and scared hearts were all around,

There were some who were so close yet so far,

I have tried to reach out but they didn't want a hand,

What am I to do,

This place has become so dark,

And all I could do is watch while a tiny candle flickers,

As some walk toward the sea,and drown themselves,

I screamed and asked again if they wanted me to send them a boat,

But they can't hear me anymore,

As tears trickle down my face,

I see the ones I cared for sink down to the depths of the ocean,

When no one wants a hand,

I can't save them,no matter how hard I try,

All I can do is weep and pray,

That they will be saved.....somehow.

The Sea of life

[Mood:Bored]

[Music: Green Day - Minority]

As the endless length of sea stared at me,

And I looked futher,

The wind blew and assuraance swept over me,

I knew everything will be alrite.

Am dreaming and alwayz do,

About everything,

Past,present,future,

Fear and memories take over time to time,

Life shouldn't be this hard,

It really shouldn't,

Yet it is,

Why is there alwayz pain and suffering?

Theres something in the distance,

And I want it,

Its the length thats holding me back,

But I will get,

I will.....

I wrote this while I was at the beach.Thought I'll post it.....

Over it.....

[Mood: Confused]

[Music: Anneliese van der Pool - Over It]

How could you know

That behind my eyes a sad girl cried

And how could you know

That I hurt so much inside

And how could you know

That I'm not the average girl

I'm carrying the weight of the world

YEAH!

So can you get me outta here

[chorus]

Take me away

We'll jump in the car

Drive til the gas runs out and then walk so far

That we can't

See this place anymore

Take a day off

Give it a rest

So I can forget about this mess

If i lighten up a little bit,

Then I will be

Over It

I'm playin the role of the happy girl

But no one knows

Inside I'm alone

But I would never let it show I get everyday

Too much work and not enough play

Over and over,It's always the same

YEAH!
But you can make everything OK...

[chorus]

Take me away

We'll jump in the car

Drive til the gas runs out and then walk so far

That we can't

See this place anymore

Take a day off

Give it a rest

So i can forget about this mess,If i lighten up a little bit,Then i will be

Over it,Over it
And when the world is closin' in I can leave it all and just walk away I can always start all over again I am closer to a better day

If I lighten up a little bit,

Then I will be,

Then I'll be over it,

Over it,

I am Over It (over it)

Love this song speacially the lyrics....

It was great...

[Mood: Happy]

[Music:Ashlee Simpson - Sorry]

Heyz everyone,

I'm back.I had a good holiday and it helped clear my head a lot.

The beach is a beautiful place to think and let go everything thts in ur heart.

I went to Terengganu btw.It was a long drive,for like 4 hours.Half way through my sister decided to put the Jesse McCartney cd on and she was singing along to the whole cd .After a few songs,my mum become a fan too.*siGh* The entire journey had everyones favourite music on.There was fusion(my dad is into tht stuff),pop(me and my sis),and a bit of old stuff(my mum).....

The place was nice.Really quiet town where everyone loves the simple life.Ppl around there are mostly fisherman and all.There are major oil industries and all but most foreigners work there. The locals mostly have simple jobs.

My week was spent lazing,reading and writin by the beach,riding on 8tivies and speedboats,going for firefly watching and just chillin by the pool.It was total vacation.The funniest thing tht happened was when this guy gave me his handphone number.Yes ppl u read rite....LOL

There was this bunch of boyz who were working by the beach and everytime I passed, they'll try their best 2 get my attention and like on the 3rd day,one of them gave me his handphone number.LOL

Talk bout desperate...LOL

I had a great time....

This vaca really did me some good.

And so its back 2 quiet life.....

Holiday!!

[Mood:Excited]
[Music:Diana DeGramo - The Difference In Me]

I found my IC!!!!!
Thank God!!!
It was found in the van I was in on the way back from Genting.
Picked it up 4rom Esther's house 2day.
Just came home from dinner,had it at The Concorde.
I love the food there!!!
LOL

I won't be here the whole of next week, ppl.
Will be going for a nice,long holiday.
I want and need it badly!!!
Can't wait......

C ya all next weekend!!!
God Bless!!

CioZ!!

Feelingz

[Mood: Still Spacey]
[Music: M2M - Don't Say You Love]

Feelings as it is,is very unpredictable,
and we mess them up even more,

One day ur love,the next you hate,

Then you long and want,

Its all so very complicated.

Pain,hurt and longing comes after the heart breaks and shatters,
Tht is one of the many effects when the heart breaks,
Then comes loneliness and depression.
And everything rotten.....

Through friendship and care,the heart restores.
And with time,the pain goes and fades out,

But there will alwayz be memories hunting and lingering....

I have no idea why I wrote this....

Life and its craziness,its complicated secrets and mysterious,
I hope I figure them some day,right now I know very extremely little bout them.
But am fine with wht I know now,
Kinda...
I wanna know more bout me,
Trying to all the time,

Wish I wasn't so very predictable at certain times,
And shy,
But am proud of me being the wild,loud,crazy gurl I am,
Thts me
Am Happy!!

The joy of being a teenager,
The happiness, sadness, joyfullness, the friendships, relationships,the adolescence,the crapness,the complicatedness,the distinctness
The weirdness,the influences, the obssesion over the media, and the plain wonderful crazyness!!!

I LOVE IT!!!!

Everyday is going by...

[Mood: Spacey]
[Music: The Killers - Mr. Brightside]

Watched "Batman Begins" yesterday.It was really good.The speacial effects and all.The new batman is totally hott too.LOL.The movie was kinda long though,like 2 hours plus.Way long for a Batman flick.
Theres strong assurance in the ending tht there will be a part two.So thts cool

The heroine is Katie Homes,Tom cruise's new gf.Talk bout a really old guy with a young gurl.Whts the hell is wrong with this gurls anywayz??

Total weirdness.....for goodness sack just cause his loaded with cash and fame doesnt mean you force urself 2 fall in love with him..*sheesh*

Went 2 the dentist yesterday and she said tht my braces can come off in two months!!!!
But then they'll put the retainers right away.....
Tht really suxz
But Thank God thts like for only six months.

WOW!!!

[Mood: Extremely Happy]
[Music: Marion Raven - Break You]

Today was one of the "best yet the worst day of life."
Well kinda at least.In the morning before heading to church,I found out I lost my identity card.*Sniffles*
Tht was it.My parents yelled at me all the way from the house to the church.They kept going on and on bout responsiblilty.
Sometimes I really try to be responsible,I really do but I just really sux at it at times.......fuck...
Then my mum went on bout tht this is my last outing outstation with my homies..yada..yayda..yayda...
That will only be implyed for this year anywayz.Thts wht she said last year also.
Then they said tht maybe I won't be able 2 get the tickets for the showcase cause they'll usually ask for ur IC.I was really disappointed when I heard tht but still kept a little hope up.You just never know.......
After church,we come home,changed and headed to J.W Marriot.
There was a few ppl there who were getting their tickets.I was afraid but I went to the counter and they asked for my name,I found it in their list and... Guess wat??
They GAVE me the ticketz!!!!!
I was physced and totally grateful!!
Waited in the line till like 2:45,it was a totol borin wait with my sis(Note to self:Next time grab a fren to bring along)am not being mean or anything but she doesnt even really like Marion Raven,so yeah.While waitin this lady come up 2 me and she asked if she gave me the "meet and greet pass" and I was like no and the she handed it to me and told me 2 wait after the showcase!!! I wanted 2 scream badly but sadly I couldn't.LOL. Then at 3 they showed us in the hall.And then two Hitz.FM deejayz,Junior and Peatro,was just fooling around a while.They had
some autograped stuff they were givin away.Didnt win any though,I didnt try either.Then at like 3 something Marion come.Everyone just went crazy,pushed past the fence and went right in front of the stage and tht included me. LOL Some of the songs she sang was "Here I am,"Thirteen dayz,"Break You" I love tht song!!,and also "End of me."She also sang a M2M song tht everyone was singing along too and the best song of the showcase was definately "End of Me"It was fun to see everyone sing along 2 it.It was a blast!!
It finished at bout 3:45,then I was waitin in the "Meet and Greet" line.They were lettin five ppl at a time.While waitin I met this gurl,forgot her name though,and we were just chattin,then this guy from Sayful and two another girls joined in and we told the guard tht we all wanted to go in at the same time.Just before I went in the room,I was totally nervous.Marion was really friendly and nice.She shaked our hands and thanked us all for coming.Shes really tall though,I felt freakin short next 2 her,hehehe....I asked her to sign my poster,my sisters'and my autography book.She saw tht my book was Cleo and asked if I saw this months issue and I was like yeah.I was just plain nervous.LOL
Then we had a group photo and all!!

Will post the pictures up soon!

Tht was my day,the best and worst....

Totolly weird yet totally aweosme!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was all good!

[Mood: Tired]
[Music:None]

Well I just come home from a carnival,helped out there.Not really helped but just sat there.(:P)

Am really really worn out......and just dead

The Genting trip was total fun.Had loadzof fun with Esther and my younger pet sis,Hannah
and her fren.It was all good.Just totally messed around and gooffed off.The first day was spent chillin round,the second was spent in the theme park,it was totally fun hanging with the guyz,they were just all crazy!! LOL
In conclusion it was totally great!!

Am gonna go get some rest now
2moro is another long day!!
CANT WAIT!!

I feel like someone just wacked me up.....

And so;at last

[Mood: Special]

[Music: The Killers - Mr. Brightside]

Well I'll be going 2 my very first concert in 5 dayz time!!

My very first concert!!!!!!

Am totally physced bout it.Its the Marion Raven showcase btw.

I won those tickets in a Star call in thing.

Also I will be going 2 Genting this thursday with Esther and a few other ppl.

Tht will be fun.

I needed a break anywayz.

This week will be kinda hectic.

I think....Most probably

*At LaSt*

I love hectic weeks.They alwayz seem to keep me in a good mood.

So it has been predicted tht it will be a awesome week!!

*Hope tht stayz the same*

The effect that never should be big

[Mood:Happy]

[Music: Marion Raven - End of Me]

Will be going 2 Esther's house today,we'll just chill out and talk most probably,

It would do me some good to spend time with her.....

Shes a good listener and am a good talker(:P).

So its all cool.

I've been feelin so much better 2day,am glad am over this whole depression thing,

Though at times I do get mad thinkin bout it,theres nothing much I can do......

I was just thinkin lately;if u make one little mistake,there are so many wayz it can effect u.

I hope the mistake I made doesnt have much effect.I really don't want a huge disaster.I so don't want it 2 ruin a friendship.

I really don't.

Reality Hurtz

[Mood: Blank]

[Music: Ashlee Simpson - Better Off]

As reality hit me when I woke up,

I felt the sting of my tears,

I cried wayy too much thts why it hurts,

Everything tht happened come back 2 my mind,

I felt numb for a while,

Too bad it lasted temperarily,

My heart ached all over again,

As tears fell,all I could is wander...

Am never gonna be stupit or so very gulliable again,

And so another lesson has been learned

*siGh*

How long is this pain going 2 last??

I hope not too long.....

Anyone there...bet not...

[Mood: Depressed]

[Music: Ryan Cabrera - Take It All Away]

Am totally immune 2 this,

Cause it has alwayz been happening 2 me,

I wanna run away from here,

I wanna start a new life,

Away from this place,

Am screaming but no one hears me,

Not one soul,

Maybe I should scream louder,

But I bet thts useless

Cause no one;and I mean no one will ever hear me.....ever......

Why the hell does this keep happening??

[Mood: Sad]

[Music: Vertical Horizon - Echo]

Why am I so very gullible?

Why am I so blind at times,

Why the hell didnt I see this coming?

I thought maybe;maybe you were different

I want to be alone,

I dont want anyone anymore,

I want you to stay away from me,

I told you didnt I,

Tht I never want to get hurt again and I trusted you..

Somehow in my heart I knew this would happen,

I didnt want to be a replacement,

But u didnt listen did u?

I have no words,

I am tired of this happening to me,

I seriesly dont know wht ppl think of me,

Maybe a person to hurt,to be broken and shattered,

Thts wht everyone has been doing,

I want to be alone and I want you far away from me................

Yada..Yada..Yada....

[Mood: Cool]
[Music: Lindsay Lohan - Nobody Till You]

Change will always be part of our lives,
Even though sometimes I wish change wasn't that active in life,
Change will alwayz be apreciated,
Yet there are at times it will be hated,
Well rite now there has been some change,
Good changes..I truly appreciate them
I needed it,

I just realized this evening that every time u fall in love,
Theres alwayz a mark left,
Some sort of memory that will stay with you forever,
It depends on what kind of relationship that u've been in,
In a sweet relationship a loving memory is left,
In a bitter one,a nightmare will linger........